I'm very glad you posted this ... because you can get help. Do not worry about the hows and whys you are in the position you are in, just focus on fixing the situation. You have what in TCM we call "unstable essence" and likely a chronic yin deficient nature. You need two formulas: Jin Suo Gu Jing Wan & Liu Wei Di Huang Wan. You need them in high doses. You also need to build your lost jing up ... the good news is that this is easy and cheap. Lecithin is essentially the modern supplement of Jing. The tail of your sperm use is for fuel. Don't buy a cheap patent of those formulas, E Fong (this is my favorite brand) or Blue Poppy brand will do. Take 4 - 6 1200 mg capsules of lecithin daily. Your depression is natural due to your adrenal problems (TCM Kidneys include adrenals), understand that it is natural to feel the way you do ... but don't listen to your thoughts in the sense that they are not your "normal thoughts" they are being changed by your current physical condition. There is LOTS to do for your health ... don't give up my friend ... it can, and will, get better. If your TCM Doctor doesn't fix you up to the point where you are feeling much better within a month or so, can him. Hope this makes you feel better ...
